Death; something that is inevitable, but a complete mystery at the same time. A topic associated with sorrow and grief but simultaneously with relief and joy as well. Death. How should one feel towards it? Many people fear its arrival as there is no sure way of knowing when it will come, how it will manifest itself, and what it will feel like. The only people who know how death feels are those who have already died but even if those people could share their experiences, everyone’s death is unique to their own. So how should one feel towards death? Well, as an up incoming physician I feel as though it may mean failure. It may mean that I have let someone down. I, a future health provider who will take an oath to preserve life, will have let someone slip through my grasp. However, is that really what it means? A death can mean failure if I as a health provider have let my patients pass violently and abruptly. I may have used my technical skills and demonstrated the knowledge and experiences I acquired throughout medical school, but if I fail to show compassion, kindness, and competence towards my patients, have I really done them any justice? On the other hand, as a physician, I can also create a space where death can be beautiful for patients. A safe place, where one can be at peace, and come to terms with death instead of fighting against it. How can I do this? I can sit down with my patient and talk to them as an equal. I can be honest about what I can offer them in terms of treatment but explain the limits of what I have to offer. I will not skip around the fact of death if I know it will come. I will treat them as a normal human being, not as someone who is sickly or dying. I will allow them to die as they please, surrounded by whoever they please. Death is not, in fact, scary. It is natural, organic, and familiar. What do I mean by familiar? Well, death is when we become one with the Earth. When we finally achieve the ultimate equilibrium. As inhabitants of the Earth, we should know it well, no? So why do humans fight death? Why as a physician should I see death as an enemy? Death is a part of life and my job as a physician is to facilitate life. Death can be curious. Death can come in sleep or be delivered by another organism. Sometimes death craves the old who have lived full lives, while other times it snacks on those who have barely even begun there life. Death confuses me but at the same time, I find it so fascinating. As a physician, I will become very comfortable with death and I will welcome it. Inside my home, we will converse over what will happen to my patients and who will win them over. I can only hope that I win many battles, but no one is perfect and no one can win all their battles. Life and death, life and death. Complicated as they are, they create harmony in medicine. Life is a question and death is the answer. It is concrete, it is loyal, it will always be there waiting for you. Oh death, oh death, oh lovely death. All the things I can say about you. My final thought, my only thought, death hello, I am ready for you.

This entry is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International license.