Throughout this course, there has been a number of pieces that have left considerable impressions on me and that have left me questioning myself and the world I live in. One piece that hit me considerably hard was Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro. Initially, I couldn’t understand where the piece was going, but the ominous tone that was set in the first few lines reeled me in and I was instantly sucked in. My love for this book stems from the fact that not only do I see myself in this piece, but I see the world around me as well. As I delved deeper and deeper into the piece, I felt as if I was right there alongside Kathy, existing as she did. Every feeling, event, and interaction she went through, I felt as if I was going through it as well. As Kathy grew, I grew, as she became aware of the world around her, I become aware of the one around me. I can’t find a piece of text in this novel that I can’t create a parallel to either the real world or to my life specifically. However, despite how relatable I find this piece of literature, witnessing someone else’s experience and thought-process in a world I find so similar to mine has caused me to make several realizations. From this book, I realized that the world that I have been raised in isn’t really the real world at all. It is simply an illusion of what society wants me to believe is the world. Just like how the Donors at Hailsham had a world vastly different from what the reality of what theirs would be constructed for them by the Guardians, the media, government, and culture of America has constructed one for us. Information given to me is given for a reason and is presented in a certain way on purpose. I can’t trust anything or anyone around me but at the same time, I have no other choice but to. I must be skeptical but accepting; cautious but carefree. This type of thinking has placed me in an interesting mindset that has allowed me to broaden my horizon of the world and attempt to find a lens that isn’t as cloudy as the one I was using before. Another realization this book has led me to is that some things in life are just meant to be taken as is. Some things, are simply not worth fighting against because it was meant to happen anyway, and in some cases, we know they are coming too. An example of a situation that this applies to is death. In life, we know that no one lives forever and that death is a cycle of life. However, when it comes around, we try our bests to avoid its arrival and to fight off its presence. We use respirators, send our loved ones into vegetative states, and take the organs of others. The ironic thing is, that we know its coming, just like Kathy knew that Ruth’s death was coming, and Tommy’s and her own. How Kathy dealt with the loss of Tommy has really taught me a lot about the extreme lows that I have been going through from the start of this semester and has helped me cope with events that I find I just want to run away from. Reading this novel has just been simply enlightening.

Currently, in my brutally abused, sleep-deprived, and deteriorating state, this book nurtures my metamorphosis as I begin my journey of finding who I am and who I aspire to be. As I struggle to maintain friendships, stay on top of my work, and keep in touch with my “old life”, this book is a reminder of how to maintain sanity. It reminds me that its okay that I feel different from everyone else, its okay to just accept certain events that people may think I need to react to, its okay question any information fed to me on social media and in school, and it is most definitely okay to use past memories to cope with losses in my life, whether it be old friends, new friends, or doomed love interests. In a life where the only definite thing I have to look forward to is death, I’m allowed to do whatever I want, question whatever I want, seek out whatever information I want, and have whatever beliefs I want. Who has any right to tell me what to do or who to be when I already have the certainty of death taking up half my plans? I refused to be trapped in a box and force-fed what society thinks I need to survive. Like Tommy, I will be rebellious and I won’t be afraid to be different. Like Ruth, I will be assertive and create my own personal image to fit how I want others to portray me. And finally, I will be like Kathy and live life without sorrow but instead with memory and passion. Hey world, here I come.

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